My Journey to Joy

February 6, 2013

Why We Adopt by Lara

Filed under: Shared Findings — aunthoddy @ 5:00 AM
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Why We Adopt

Published January 29, 2013 | By The Farmer’s Wife
I was recently at a party and introduced to someone new. Of course, my friend doing the introducing said something like, “This is my friend who adopted from Africa” which I’m pretty sure is code for This is the weirdo I told you about. Anyway, the new acquaintance was shocked that we had adopted, and not really shocked in the good way. She was shocked like I had just told her I play with fireworks for fun. She kept saying things like, “But, but, won’t those kids have problems? Won’t they need counseling? How do your other kids feel about this? Why did you decide to do that?” Bless her heart. Sure, some of her questions were obnoxious, but I think the question of why is a valid one. So to set the record straight, I’ll put it all out there here and now. This is why we adopt (notice I didn’t say we adopt-ed. Because that’s past tense and would seem I am saying we’re done. Which we aren’t. Hee hee.)First and foremost, we adopt because this is God’s calling on our family. I know that sounds cliche and maybe a little nuts. But, really, my life’s purpose involves parenting these children brought to us through adoption. This is what we want to be doing. I love helping them sort through their “stuff.” I get a real kick out of showing them unconditional love. Parenting them brings us meaning and fulfillment.Secondly, we wanted more children. We like a big, loud, crazy family and adopting children is how we chose to get there.

Thirdly, we are Christians and we care about who Jesus cares about. And He cares about kids who don’t have moms and dads. Notice, this is third down the list. That’s for a reason. See, being specifically led to adoption and wanting more children are prerequisite to this. One can care deeply about children without wanting to parent those children and that’s okay. This isn’t for everyone. There are many ways to care about orphaned children without adopting them. We care about these children in the way that we want to parent them. Through the sunshine-y, happy days and through the really hard days. We want to see how their stories play out and how the Lord redeems their hurts.

Finally, we choose adoption because we deeply believe all life matters. I don’t mean life matters in the pro-life bumper sticker sort of way. I mean these kids lives matter in that they deserve to grow up loved and cherished. If I’m going to wave my Jesus Flag, I think I need to really examine the way I see others. If all life matters and it’s all created equally, then the lives of the lost and forgotten matter too. Once again, adoption is just one way we live out the value that life matters. My grandparents have been involved in prison ministry for a bajillion years because they believe the lives of inmates matter.

Now, here’s why we didn’t adopt.

To rescue or save our children. Anyone who knows me would know I am totally incapable of singlehandedly saving anyone. If anyone has been saved through these adoptions, it’s me. Saved from my own complacency and selfishness and American dreams of a tidy little family, clean house and nice car.

To be just like Angelina Jolie. Want to know how trendy I feel with internationally adopted kids? Super hip and cool. NOT. They are children, not accessories.

Because I’m so saintly and unselfish that I just can’t help but give and give and give and get nothing in return. Ha. Ha. Let me share the great big secret of adoption with you: I am absolutely getting something out of this. I get a son and daughter who are precious beyond words. I get to see the miracle of kids who didn’t come from my belly call me Momma. I get hugs and kisses and hand-drawn pictures. I get to take part in these little lives restored by Jesus.

And that’s why we adopt.

I’d say I’m a pretty lucky lady, wouldn’t you?


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