My Journey to Joy

March 7, 2012

Infertile, But Not Childless

Filed under: Shared Findings — aunthoddy @ 5:00 AM
Tags: , ,

 Even in the dark womb of infertility, blessings can be found. Gary and Marilyn Purdy, for example, learned that “infertile” need not be synonymous with “childless.”

When the Purdys married in 1990, Gary was directing the Campus Crusade ministry at Baylor University. They dreamed of having babies and raising a family. Since she was 32, Marilyn was eager to get started, but after a year, she had not conceived. Three years later, after “lightweight tests” by her physician, consultations with infertility specialists, medication and a series of injections—still no baby. And worst of all, there was no medical explanation. “Everyone around us was having babies easily, and it became very stressful. It seemed so unfair,” Marilyn admits. In vitro fertilization was the next option, but with their limited financial resources, and given the long odds, the Purdys were reluctant.

They began to consider adoption. “The most appealing fact about adoption was that everyone we were aware of who had pursued adoption had gotten a baby,” she notes. Marilyn, having grown up around adopted children, was far more receptive to the idea than her husband. However, by faith he was willing to proceed. “I asked myself, ‘Am I desirous of becoming a daddy?’ Since my answer was yes, I agreed that we should try to adopt a child,” Gary recalls.

Five months later, in 1995, the Purdys received a phone call that their son had been born. “The moment we got that call, Gary engaged. It was beautiful to see him bonding emotionally with Davis even before he held the baby in his arms. What a confirmation from God,” Marilyn says. In 1999, mom and dad gave Davis a new sister, ClaraLane, adopting her when she was eight months old.

“Sometimes people used to ask, ‘Are you still trying to have one of your own?’ I can’t imagine having children more our own than Davis and ClaraLane,” Marilyn asserts. “We would never go back and choose to have a child biologically if it meant we couldn’t have them. It fills us with awe to think that before time began, God orchestrated all of the circumstances – even the deep valley of infertility – so we could have the joy of becoming their parents.”

Today Gary pastors North Shore Fellowship in Chattanooga, Tenn., where he and Marilyn have often shared comfort and encouragement with others also coping with infertility. –By Robert J. Tamasy

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