My Journey to Joy

June 23, 2011

Adoption-ese

Filed under: Adoption 101 — aunthoddy @ 8:09 PM
Tags: , ,

Do you know how to speak the language of adoption?  🙂  I’m learning lots of new things, and I’d like to share some with you.

Words carry a lot of power.  A simple phrase can pack a lot of meaning, even when we don’t realize it!  I’ve been working on my attitudes, prejudices, and perspectives, but I need to work on my verbage too!  Here is a little list of better ways to say things pertaining to adoption:

Don’t Say:                                                    Instead Say:

Real parent                                                  Biological parent/birthparent

Is adopted                                                    Was adopted

Put up for adoption                                      Placed with an adoptive family

Gave away her child                                    Made an adoption plan

Adoptive child/parent                                  Child/parent

Can you see the difference?!  Just minor changes, but so significant.  I’m working on these; I still slip sometimes!

Recently someone told me that I wouldn’t love an adopted child as much as I would “one of my own.”  I guess she knows, from her vast experience of only having biological children!  (sarcasm…it made me mad!)  If/when God blesses us with a child or children, they will be ours!  Not our adopted child, not our sort-of child- our child.  Will everything be the same as a biological child?  Of course not!  But, oh yes, they will be loved as much!

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